Emperor - In the Nightside Eclipse (Black Metal)

For a band supposedly attempting to harness the majesty of nature, In the Nightside Eclipse is an astonishingly vapid album. Gone are the epic narrative subtleties of Hvis Lyset Tar Oss, as are the haunting atmospheres of Mindless Horror and the impeccable riffcraft of Fenrir Prowling.

Here, bland synths interact with tired black metal riffs you've heard too many times before... but then again, recycling is green. Listening to this album gives me the overwhelming urge to buy used condoms, a MacBook and drink overpriced coffee. There's nothing resembling the majesty of nocturne here, more like a safe trip through a carnival fest or a safari zoo. For music that actually plumbs the full depths of nature, in its transcendent glory and gore, see Neraines. Otherwise, steer clear of this third-rate Burzum wannabe.

I recommend this album In the Nightside Eclipse to absolutely nobody. There is simply no reason to ever listen to this garbage, and I'd rather listen to Brokencyde for 24 hours straight than even have to listen to one song from this awful album. Emperor is basically an uninspired Burzum / Immortal ripoff band with synths, and you know you're doing something wrong if you're ripping off the band that wrote an entire album called Diabolical Fullmoon Mysticism. The only reason Emperor never "sold out" is because there is strictly nothing to sell. Forget this band even exists, as none of their releases can be described as anything more than garbage music for posers.